Marriage, the Nigerian Woman and her many fears Updated for 2021


Updated: February 28, 2021

By Oreoluwa Ogunsola | Today News Africa

In a country that places so much emphasis on a woman “settling down”, the fears of many women seem to revolve around the issue of marriage.

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It is culturally accepted in many tribes in Nigeria that a woman gets married to the man and his family, hence, the woman’s desire to feel accepted by her husband’s family.

“The fear of rejection is one of my greatest fears; especially rejection in marriage. I see marriage as a life long commitment. I would feel devastated if I get married to someone and his family doesn’t even like me. I have seen it happen to people I know and trust me, it’s quite frustrating,” Vanessa Ogunsola, a 22-year-old Nigerian woman, told me.

“Sometimes I wonder why some families make life difficult for women who want to marry into their family. How difficult can it be, your son loves a woman whom he wants to spend the rest if his life with, then you begin to antagonize her because you hate the tribe she’s hails from or there are some personal attributes she has that you don’t like,” she added.

However, while some women seem to fear rejection in marriage, others are worried about the future of their children.

Wunmi Sanusi, a 20-year-old undergraduate of the University of Ibadan, falls in the latter category

According to her, “The system of education in Nigeria is not getting any better. I’m scared of the future and what it holds for my children. What kind of educational system are they going to meet? Better or worse”

She said with the current tide of change that has swept the globe, conventional ideas are being taken over by artificial intelligence.

“The current trends in technology are shaping our world, shaping the future of work yet we are not adequately incorporating  technology into our curriculum. Critical thinking is being emphasized over memorizing yet we still find our students learn by memorizing”.

Education and marriage are not the only fears of the Nigerian woman. Some women are afraid of the circumstances that might hamper their transition to achieving their dreams.

This is the case with Yetunde Ilesanmi, a young babysitter who had been forced to fend for herself at an early age.

With a dejected look on her face, she said “I don’t know what the future holds for me. Sometimes it scares me. I have been through a lot of challenges in the past. Presently, I am working so that I can save some money and then write Jamb next year. Whenever I think about the future, I don’t even know if it will be better than the past. I also don’t know how to make it better”

Oreoluwa Ogunsola was born in the metropolitan city of Lagos, Nigeria and studied Guidance and Counselling/ Communication and Language Arts at the University of Ibadan in Oyo state where she developed the love for writing early in life and hasn’t stopped since then.


Today News Africa
Today News Africa
Today News Africa is a US-based international news organization focused on US-Africa policy and breaking news. Our goal is to provide truthful and exclusive stories to a diverse audience across North America and the African Continent. Subscribe to our news page at and Follow us on Twitter @todaynewsafrica


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